Week 4: literally zero surprises

THAT WAS SO BORING WTH?


Week 5: AP and USA Today Top 25, courtesy of ESPN.

first thoughts:

    —OMG NORTHWESTERN HAIL TO PURPLE HAIL TO WHITE
    —Fresno State? what is this world coming to

OMG, so tell me what happened this weekend.

well, nothing really, except my brother got married today. that wuz kewl. 

1. #22 Notre Dame beats Michigan State at home. 

GODDAMMIT WHY. all the Spartans really had to do was just effing try. they could have easily overcome the shitstorm that was the Notre Dame football team. instead, they got called for pass interference FOUR TIMES and a holding penalty while Notre Dame quarterback Tommy Rees had the worst game he's had all season. it could have been so easy, you pricks.

you can (and will) say this:

"Notre Dame has no chance against the Sooners this weekend, especially after their bye week."

okay, soooo that's it. what are we doing next weekend?

buckle up, bitches. it's gonna be a huge football weekend. maybe you can go to the mall. 

in order of importance:

#14 Oklahoma at #22 Notre Dame

i am fairly confident, both that i will not find a ticket to this game and also that we will beat the Irish. coach Bob Stoops has already announced Blake Bell will start as quarterback (i mean, duh), so at least we'll have some reliability against the Irish. unfortunately, this game is not in Norman, otherwise we would have this shit in the bag. i can't wait to show up to work next Monday.

#6 LSU at #9 Georgia

first of all, LSU should not be ranked #6, especially after its piss-poor showing against Auburn this weekend. LSU won 35-21. Auburn is unranked. i'm calling a Georgia win because Aaron Murray is unstoppable and i have a football crush on him. and also a real crush.

#23 Wisconsin at #4 Ohio State

this game is only important if you are a Wisconsin fan and are delirious. Ohio State is fresh off of a really rude 76-0 win against Florida A&M. but Wisconsin also proved itself against Purdue, beating them 41-10 this weekend. but that doesn't matter. both teams are dumb, Ohio State is merely better at football.

#21 Ole Miss at #1 Alabama

this could actually be interesting. even if Ole Miss doesn't beat Alabama (which it won't). it would still be satisfactory to see someone actually hurt Bama a little bit. Ole Miss just beat Texas, and i like that, while the Crimson Tide barely beat Texas A&M 49-42. all we need from this is someone to prove that Alabama does not deserve to be #1.