"buckeye?" no. |
it's a tree.
"come at me" |
SO HERE'S THE DEAL WITH OHIO STATE. THEY FUCKED UP.
the Buckeye football team is up shit creek with NCAA for violating its rules. former coach Jim Tressel (2002 NCAA Coach of the Year, lolz) was suspended last season for failing to tell NCAA that his players had a "financial agreement" with a grimy tattoo parlor owner/possible drug dealer. his players were said to be selling team merchandise and even team rings in exchange for TATTOOS. WHAT. YOU GOT YOURSELVES IN THIS SHIT FOR TATTOOS. i don't even know what to say right now.
Jim Tressel and the players said to be involved in the scandal were suspended for the first five games of this season (which doesn't matter anyways, because Ohio State forced Tressel to resign in May) and fined him $250,000.
but it did matter for star quarterback Terrelle Pryor, who is a big effing deal. he's being investigated too, because he drives a 350z and that's way too nice of a car for a college student to buy on his own. actually, Sports Illustrated says he drove up to eight cars during his time at OSU. and ummmm you can't just take cars just because you're good at football. he wasn't a fan of being suspended and i'm guessing shit went down not too gracefully in Ohio State, so Terrelle Pryor PEACED OUT of Ohio State in June. he's eligible for the Supplemental Draft (basically the football version of spring rush, when the shitty houses take more girls to fill up their numbers), but no word on if he's declared.
Tressel and company just met with the NCAA Infractions Committee today, actually. the announcement of their actual penalty will come in 12 weeks, as investigations are still going on. for good measure, the athletic director at Ohio State said they'll pay NCAA $338,811 for its share of the Big Ten's payment for having played in the bowl game.
so yeah. Ohio State is fucked. but that is their problem.
anyways.
colors: scarlet and gray
conference: Big Ten - Leaders
mascot: Brutus Buckeye. his appearance confuses me because he is not a tree. my only guess is he's supposed to be one of the tree's nuts.
brutus, what are you? |
are you this? yeah, you're definitely supposed to be this. |
i was not afraid of nuts before, but |
coach: Luke Fickell, first year as head coach. used to be co-defensive coordinator and linebacker coach at Ohio State. actually, spent his entire life there - redshirted in 1992 and played until he graduated in 1997. started in the 1997 Rose Bowl win against Arizona. pretty coo. has big shoes to fill in that Jim Tressel got a lot of wins as head coach. has small shoes to fill in that all he needs to do is NOT GET HIS TEAM IN HUGE SHIT.
oh... you're young and even kind of handsome. that's nice. |
competitors:
senior Joe Bauserman
comparable to the Pilsbury Doughboy |
i hope you used your own money to pay for those |
makes this face in every photograph |
the low-down: Ohio State is/maybe was awesome. like, really baller. like, they have gone to a major BCS bowl or BCS National Championship every year for the past six seasons and have been in the top tier of college football for the past decade. that's why it's kind of a sad season for them. they're coming off of a loss of their amazing coach and amazing quarterback and at least four players for the first five games. their offensive line looks strong, except starting left tackle Mike Adams will be out for those first few games because he's allegedly devious. defense doesn't look too bad either - even though they're losing two starters, their replacements look aight. the good news for OSU is that their schedule looks conquerable, with the only notables being Michigan State, Nebraska, Wisconsin, maybe Penn State. they'll have a good season because their schedule isn't bad, but they'll lose whatever big bowl they get invited to.
first game: Akron at home.
Akron? |
HAHAHAH Annie..... This blog is amazingness. Akron?
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