#3 oregon ducks

OH MY GOD YOUR UNIFORMS ARE SO UGLY

*throws up*

colors: green and yellow

conference: Pac -12

mascot: The Oregon Duck. used to be represented by Donald Duck, but you know Disney - they kill fun.

still very, very Donald-like

coach: Chip Kelly, third year. has had only four losses during his two years at Oregon. is also really cool: after a rude fan demanded a full refund for his expenses after watching Oregon lose to Boise State, Chip wrote him a check for $439. he's been named the Pac-10 Coach of the Year for the past two years as well as a shload (shitload) of other awards, including the 2010 Associated Press Coach of the Year.

quarterback: #5 junior Darron Thomas, who's taking over for Jeremiah Masoli - who was dismissed from the team for a whole slew of problems. the guy pled guilty to second-degree burglary, and was suspended for all last season. then they found some mary jane on him and Ol' Chip kicked him off the team. good job. Darron apparently does not have a criminal record. but he needs to stop hanging out with druggies. 

hottie index: 7/10. either he's adorable or has a knack for taking super-cute photos. i should get lessons.

dawwwwww

DAWWWWWW

the low-down: had they won the BCS National Championship against Auburn, it would have been the ultimate perfect season. but they didn't. they got dominated and went 12-1 last year. muahaahaha. they're losing a few key starters like wide receiver Jeff Maehl, but on the whole, the Ducks have little to worry about. 

first game: LSU at the Dallas Cowboys Stadium. great season opener, one i don't give a shit about.

GUESS WHAT? THEY LOST