#4 LSU tigers

colors: purple and gold
conference: SEC - Western
mascot: Mike the Tiger, who is a real fucking tiger. yes, LSU continues to take real tigers from the jungle and put them in Louisiana. they even ignored PETA's request to stop after Mike V died (kidney failure, WOW). for now, Mike VI is still alive.

this is like someone dangling filet mignon outside of your room and not letting you eat it

coach: Les Miles, sixth year. former head coach of Oklahoma State, now contracted to be LSU's head coach til 2017. i'll be married by then...right? has a 62-17 record at LSU, which is not too shabby.

quarterback: well, it would have been #9 senior Jordan Jefferson, but he went and done got himself suspended after a stupid bar fight. GOOD JOB ASSHOLE. now it's either going to go to #12 Jarrett Lee or #8 sophomore Zach Mettenberger. probably Jarrett.
hottie index: boring, none of them are that good looking.
the low-down: they went 11-2 last year, losing to Auburn and Arkansas. finished their season with a win against Texas A&M at the Cotton Bowl. even though almost every starter is coming back, the big worry is around who's going to be able to lead the team as QB. and what sucks more is that they're in a very difficult division and have an awful schedule: Oregon, Mississippi State, Auburn, Alabama, Arkansas. good luck... NOT.
first game: Oregon in Arlington, Texas. whoa, this is a great fucking first game. i hate both teams, so i really don't care who wins. prolly Oregon.